Outback Steakhouse Publicly Denies Being Controlled By A Satanic Cult

After a tweet reinvigorated the dormant conspiracy theory supposing that Outback Steakhouse was being controlled by a satanic cult due to a collection of their restaurants creating the image of a pentagram, the company released a much-needed public statement on the disturbingly delicious rumor.

“No plans, other than to bring bold steaks and Bloomin’ Onions to our guests!” The statement read. But that doesn’t truly answer the question. Does bringing bold steaks and Bloomin’ Onions to their guests fulfill some sort of prophecy? Is the prophecy to fill bellies with decent food at affordable prices? Why do they have multiple restaurant locations that, when looked at on a map, create a pentagram?

Let’s look at the tweet that sent shockwaves through the steak and potato community:

Which Outback responded to in kind:

In some self referential humor or in a blatant act of hubris, the restaurant even referenced the public’s new awareness of the pentagrams, often used in mystical cultures and secret societies, in what some believe is hiding in plain sight:

The maps showing the questionable placement of the Outback Steakhouses came from a 2012 meme that was either forgotten, or suppressed by someone powerful. It’s hard to say, but this rejuvenated interest in the dark underbelly of this potential conspiracy may finally lead to its solving. Hopefully. We’ll have to take the risk and try a loaded Bloomin’ Onion while getting to the bottom of this.